Red Eye: Leg Chair Armageddon

Welcome back, welcome backers! It’s time, once again, for our favorite conservative comedy show, “Red Eye.”

I hope you all enjoyed your Thanksgiving feasts, completely with family, friends, football and the beverages of your choice. Me? I stayed home, eating top ramen and ground beef. But don’t feel sad for me! I had a great time, and got to talk to my wonderful family on the phone. Hopefully, I’ll be seeing them soon.

Tonight’s episode covered some great topics! The recent WikiLeaks cable publications; the would-be Portland Christmas Tree Terrorist, and the sad passing of one of the funniest men on the planet, Mr. Leslie Nielsen.

I’m not going to elaborate on any of them.

Instead, I want to focus on a subject that many “Red Eye” fans find almost holy: the vaunted “Leg Chair.”

See, it happened like this: tonight, Katharine McPhee was a first time guest on “Red Eye.” The Twitter timeline quickly erupted with protests as to her hair, her clothes, her general lack of bombshell appearance.

Some people protested.

Now, leg chair quarterbacking is hardly a new pastime for the “Red Eye” crowd. Grown men, up at 3 AM, watching cable television may feel a certain news network owes them a little sexy in their lone, wee hours.

To be fair, there’s often a lot of talk from the ladies, too. “I hate Greg’s purple sweater!” “Mike Baker is soooooo hot.” “Ew. He needs to wash his hair.” “OMG. Andy Levy’s brain is TOTES sexy.”

OK. It’s possible that last one was mine. You get the drift, though.

But the “Leg Chair” has become a thing. And, being a thing, people are making too much of … a thing … out of it. Or something.

Tonight, tempers flared when people took McPhee to task for failing to tumesce them. Which I find weird.

Katharine McPhee is a first time guest. She was polite. She played along with the jokes. She sang, and sang beautifully. I also happen to think she is a very attractive young woman. And here’s where I think the “Leg Chair” double standard is kicking in: the female fans (or, to be more exact, the fans attracted to men) of “Red Eye” seem to have much broader tastes in men. Gutfeld is attractive, Levy is attractive, Kruiser is attractive. Hell, I’ve even found myself finding Jim Norton attractive, and he thinks of himself as hideous!

The point is that the men seem to get more of a “pass,” whereas only one type of female beauty is appreciated: wicked hot!

There’s nothing wrong with wicked hot. Take frequent guest Kinsey Schofield, for example. A stunning woman! Also, a great personality. She’s a total win. But so is McPhee. Her beauty is less pin-up than some might like, but her features are pleasing, and I gotta say I love the understated sex appeal of a person – male or female – who has physical beauty and doesn’t flaunt it.

So, while I love Kinsey’s va-va-va-voom demeanor and appearance, I love it because it’s her, not because it’s some ideal to which all women should aspire. Similarly, I love Huddy, McGlowan, Coulter … all the female guests who bring their unique sense of personal beauty, style and charisma to the show.

I think what has upset some people about the “Leg Chair” is that it is, apparently, the standard by which female guests are judged. While we can appreciate Baker for his mind, his humor and his mannish good looks, if a woman fails to thrill when filling the highlighted seat, then she’s somehow a “meh” guest.

Let’s give Katharine McPhee a break. The very fact people are talking about McPhee like she is less than stunning shows how much of a problem we have. Let’s turn our hatred back where it belongs: that loathsome hermaphrodite, Bill Schulz!

(Just kidding Bill. Your smile is adorable.)

Red Eye” air date – November 30, 2010. Guests: The AMAZING Katharine McPhee, Joe DeRosa and Andrew WK. Cast: Host – Greg Gutfeld, Sequential Hermaphroditic Sidekick – Bill Schulz and Ombudsman – TV’s Andy Levy

The views in this post are entirely my own (except where I’m quoting.) Neither “Red Eye” nor Fox News endorse or support my “Red Eye” posts. I am not affiliated with the show in any way, other than being an avid fan.

Help a hard working “Red Eye” fan. Support the campaign to get my posts mentioned on the show (just once!) Write to “Red Eye” and mention this blog.

7 Responses to “Red Eye: Leg Chair Armageddon”
  1. kelliejane says:

    Wait…THAT was the problem? Well, I saw the last 5 minutes & I know exactly why the men are bitching. Normally, McPhee comes off bombshell. Actually, she comes off far beyond bombshell at times to “flirting w/ inappropriate” in dress, shoes, & hair bigness. I found her appearance on Red Eye tonight to be refreshingly down to Earth.

    The guys were apparently expecting the usual Glammy McPhee. Meh. Whatevs.

    • Aha! See, my pop culture knowledge radically diminishes post-86 or so. And I’ve never watched American Idol. Consequently, I’d never even heard McPhee sing before tonight, and really had no idea what she looked like.

    • DC says:

      I honestly had no idea what she looked like either. The name sounded familiar when I heard she was going to be on but I had to look her up after the show to see a) who she was and b) what she looked like since I don’t follow American Idol and the subsequent artists who get record deals at all. Like you said, from most photos (she’s been in Stuff Magazine so there you go) she looks like a bombshell and this Christmas album and appearance actually seemed to be a departure from what she normally does. I honestly thought she was a folk/country artist based upon the performance and appearance and I could not have been more wrong.

  2. Evan Pokroy says:

    I will admit, I dissed her at first. While it’s true she lost a couple points for the lack of miniskirt, and well let’s admit it that sweater was eye stabbingly bad. When you have your wardrobe critiqued by a guy who has one color shirt and one color pants so he doesn’t make fashion mistakes, you know you’re running into issues. She seemed like a deer in the headlights for the first part of the show, but after the Halftime report she really rolled with it. She really does have that girl next door pretty look, which is a plus. I wasn’t a fan of the song, because well, sappy Xmas music is right up there with mixing milk and orange juice (Corn Nuts) as fun things to do, but wow that girl has a voice. She ended up hitting all the right joke notes, played along well, but seemed a bit subdued like she wasn’t really into it. That might be the fact that I have to squint through puffed up infected eyes, so if I watch again it might be better. I think she should be back on. But she needs to sit and not hunch over. Also…no Reindeer sweaters. I wouldn’t say know to little black dress either.

  3. Evan Pokroy says:

    Errr. Wouldn’t say NO. Not Know.

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